A Random Silly 'Starr' Thought

I wonder if someday someone will make a movie like 'The National Treasure' except instead of a map being on the back of the Declaration of Independence there is a map on the front and back of an Oreo cookie?

I wonder what the map would lead too?

Just say NO

I like to be useful, I like to be needed, I like when I feel like I'm making a difference.
A lot of those happy, warm feelings that come from 'doing' have all been flushed down the toilet as I've come into the new season of 'Just Say No!'.
'What are you talking about?' you ask very intently.
Well, I don't know that I can fully explain it, because I have never experienced this season, to this degree, before.
In 2007 I was BUSY, but it was a good busy. I was raising my son, helping with church stuff, praying for my country, friends, and family, and now the tires have screeched to a stop, and I feel the Lord taking me into a place of 'being' instead of 'doing'. 'I' feel like it's a holding place, but maybe that's a bad way to look at it-- who out there likes to be on hold? NOT ME!!
Lately every opportunity that may come up to serve in some capacity or to commit to some prayer group always ends in the Lord gently saying 'Just say no'.
'WHAT?? Esccuuuuse me Lord, don't you neeeeed my prayers, and neeeed me to serve at the church. '
'Yes, but not right now'
So, with my 'doing' being taken away, what IS He saying yes to:
Yes to more time with Him and in His word
Yes to more time with my son just to simply play and be together
Yes to long walks in complete silence
Yes to rest
Yes to peace
Well, maybe I should be thankful for this season. How about instead of thinking it as a Holding Cell; I'll try to look at it as a Rejuvenation Retreat.

Interesting Insight

It may be hard for an egg to turn into a bird: it would be a jolly sight harder for it to learn to fly while remaining an egg. We are like eggs at present. And you cannot go on indefinitely being just an ordinary, decent egg. We must be hatched or go bad. C. S. Lewis

Hungry?

When my son is hungry he acts like he is going to die if he doesn't eat right then and there. We can be in the car driving down a lonely highway and somehow he expects 'magical mommy' to pull a McDonald's Kids Meal right out of my purse IMMEDIATELY!
I guess I can't hold it against him; I, myself, hate feeling hungry. I guess the difference between me and my Ever Trusting son is that he knows that I am going to provide him some food as soon as I can. I, on the other hand, tend to completely freak out when certain hunger pains come up, worrying whether or not the Lord is going to provide the means to suffice my need, or knowing that He will, but wondering how long the waiting period is going to be 'this time'.

Luke 11: 11-13 "Which of you fathers, if your son asks for a fish, will give him a snake instead? 12 Or if he asks for an egg, will give him a scorpion? 13If you then, though you are evil, know how to give good gifts to your children, how much more will your Father in heaven give the Holy Spirit to those who ask him!"

Have I ever let my son starve to death?
No.
If he asks for chocolate cake do I give him vegetables?
Yes-- if he needs something healthy.
Does he sometimes get chocolate cake after eating something healthy?
Yes.

I surrender all my hunger pains to my Father that knows what is best for me, and always knows how to give good gifts. I choose to come to His banquet table and eat of the Lord's choice fruits!

Luke 6: 21 Blessed are you who hunger now, for you will be satisfied.

Stone Mountain

Here is a picture of Matthew pointing at the moon on top of Stone Mountain from a couple of weekends ago. I hope to post some more pics of this amazing day when I get the chance.

Me, Kathryn, and our kids had a blast!!

In the Stillness

Have you ever been in a place were someone is trying to whisper in your ear, but you struggle to hear them because the room is full of loud people?
That thought popped in my head this morning on my way to work. Lately things have been coming up, trials or fears that I'm desperate for help in. I think during those times -'Man, I wish I had a husband to talk this over with or to hold me.' or I think 'maybe, I should call so and so, they may be able to help.' And lately, in those places I find myself alone. That friend I normally go over things with is busy with her family (and that's okay), and the husband I'm waiting for, well he's simply not here yet.
In His kindness the Lord has taken me by the hand to His quiet place. Away from other's opinions and solutions because He has the answer in the stillness and even in the quietness.
I get so upset with the Lord's still small voice-- Oh how I wish He would yell so I could be absolutely sure that He is near, but then again, a whisper is so intimate. When someone whispers in your ear they are right next to you, shoulders touching, leaning in-- close enough for a kiss!! It is because of His kindness and desire for us to know Him more that He draws us away, and sometimes others away from us for a time, that we might draw near to Him. I want to learn to love His whisper; to love those times of just me and Him. Jesus treasured these times. He had the sick and broken waiting for what He had to give, but He knew that He had to have His Fathers whisper to be effective; to be Love to others. So even He would sneak away from the crowd and His disciples for alone time with His Abba Father.
Lord help me to be aware of these seasons, to treasure them and not try to escape them. Your whisper sustains us, it moves us, it strengthens us, and so much more.
He is in the stillness, quietness, and the loneliness-- right there.

Quirky Quirks

~I don't like parking decks, but I don't panic or freak out when I'm driving in one.

~I am paranoid that I have big hair, but if I was African American I would totally sport an Afro.

~I do not like elbows- they're funny looking and pointed, and I especially don't like being touched by them-- SO KEEP YOUR ELBOWS TO YOURSELF!

~If I was insane I would probably walk around with a bag of chocolate chips eating and singing songs from old musicals.

~I have stereotypes about red headed men that drive big trucks, but I won't say what they are.

~I think 3 Musketeers, Tootsie Rolls, and Candy Corn are nasty.

~I grew up in a town named after a fish that had a population of 945.

~I don't like the snow unless it is high on a mountain in Colorado in July.

~When I was little I couldn't say the 'R' sound. So when people would ask my name I would say 'Sta... Like in the sky' and I would point to the sky. I have said my 'R' sounds perfectly for a long time now.

~When I am stressed out I eat raw Oscar Meyer Cheese Hotdogs-- I know it's nasty-- I hope we can still be friends.

~If I was stranded on an island the thing I would want the most would be ice water.

~I don't know what a carburetor looks like or does and I don't want to know.

~I just noticed the other day that I'm one of those people that says 'mmbye' when getting off the phone.

What are some funny quirks you have?

MMBye...........

Just to Testify

I think one of the hardest things about being a SM (single mom) is paying the bills. I know many SM's who have not always received reliable child support-- me being one of them, and have had to work anything from up to 3 jobs.
This was one thing that I felt strongly about not doing and immediately started talking to the Lord about this very topic when I found myself in this new world. I desired to be the main person raising my son and wanted to be a mom, not a business woman.

Please note: this blog is in no way to judge any SM that has or is working 3 jobs or is in the 'working business mom world'-- I myself am also in the business world, but only part time because of the season the Lord has directed me in. This blog is simply to testify of the faithfulness of God and the way He has directed my path.

Okay, back to my story. The first job I was working was about 35 hours a week, and then from there the Lord blessed me with a really great new job working in an office with a great boss and great godly women. I was working 40 hours a week, Matthew was in after school care, and bills were being paid. It was SO hard. I really don't know how people do it outside of the grace God supplies during those times. After working these hours for about a year, during the summer of 2007 I was praying about the upcoming school year and my desire to be more involved with Matthew's school and more energized to help him after school, and I heard the Lord so clearly say to me-- 'It is not acceptable for Matthew to be in After school care anymore.' and I, of course, was like-- excuse me Lord-- do you see that I have bills to pay? do you see that I am not receiving child support? how is this suppose to work Lord? 'Just trust Me!' So I got out my notebook (just like anyone else would do) and I crunched the numbers and then I 'Showed' God-- you know because He didn't know-- heehee-- I'm so silly. Of course He was like-- 'it's not about the numbers honey, just trust me'. So before school started that year I met with my boss. I told him that the Lord told me that I need to get off at 2pm everyday to pick my son up from school. --- long silence----- 'Well, you need to do what you are feeling lead to do' is what my boss said-- Wow God! This really must be You!! Crazy!!
So, since Aug of 2007 I have been working part time. I can't tell you exactly how the bills have been paid. Money hasn't been falling out of the sky and it sure isn't growing on a tree in the back yard, but somehow the numbers stretched, the bills are paid, and food is on the table. God has been so faithful to guide me in practically all my financial decisions. He gets my 10% and along with that He takes the responsibility of the 90% and all the bills. He is faithful!! Matthew went from really struggling in school to straight A's! Matthew and I have really been able to enjoy our time together, not have stress during homework, and simply not be in a rush ALL THE TIME. Also, I have really seen the Lord's faithfulness in helping me accomplish 8 hours worth of work in a 6 hour day, and not come home absolutely exhausted. I really am adamant about not thinking about work outside of work and because of that can really put my focus on home life-- it's not always easy, but is possible with the Lord.

Psalm 37:4 Delight yourself in the LORD and he will give you the desires of your heart.
If you have a desire in your heart right now that seems impossible, what ever it may be, bring it before the Lord, and believe!! He can and will do immeasurable more than we can ask or image. That desire, most likely, is something that He has placed there and something that He wants to make a way for!!

Psalm 20:4 May He grant you according to your heart’s desire,
And fulfill all your purpose.

Jedi Wisdom from the Masters

Come check out me and Brandy's super fun AIM conversation!!

It's a must read!!

Also, Be sure to read the blog I wrote earlier today.

God's Truth......

Last weekend my son Matthew experienced a real let down from someone he truly trusted, and as we all know, that's were the true disappointments come from: those we love and trust that are not perfect and are fallible.
Well, he had been gone for the weekend and Sunday night when he got home I was tucking him in bed for the night. I was asking him how he was doing and if he was happy to be home, and he says 'Mom, this isn't my home.' And I said 'what do you mean Matthew?'. He said 'Mom, my home is in heaven.' I was so impressed with my little sons revelation of this truth. He didn't say it in sadness, he said it as factually as anyone could say anything. My little man in the midst of his pain came to the realization (with the help of Holy Spirit I'm sure) that this is not his permanent place, but just a temporary residency.
Yes I want comfort and blessings on this side of eternity for me and my son, and yes I know that I can stand and believe that we WILL see the goodness of the Lord in the land of the living, but I also know that when people disappoint or pain comes that this place is not permanent and nor are our circumstances. The Lord is though and He has stored up such a wonderful place for us without pain or disappointment-- Praise God.
Thanks Matthew!

2 Peter 3:13
But in keeping with his promise we are looking forward to a new heaven and a new earth, the home of righteousness.

Beware! You've been Busted!!

Stupid sneaky ugly devil!! I'm so angry at all his dumb schemes and sly ways.
BUT I'm so super thankful for the Lord's bright spotlight-- he got busted once again, and no weapon formed against me shall prosper!!

(By the way the enemy really isn't cute and cuddly like the picture shown here, but this definitely reveals that he is not to be feared when we serve such an amazing awesome BIG God!!)

How does it happen? One day I'm worshipping the Lord, living my life of joy and peace, and then BAM, I'm flat on my face striving for my next breath. Okay, but let me be honest here; I really shouldn't say it was ALL the enemy. Yes, yours truly-- me and my flesh-- sure did play a part. How quickly it happens when we tire of waiting and choose our own ways and our own negative thoughts over His truth. Let me tell you people: Negative thoughts swing the door wide open to the schemes of the enemy. I have struggled my whole life with using negativity to protect me from disappointment, and what a lie that is!! The Lord wants us to Hope with Him; He is longing for a people that will risk believing and standing-- even if the road seems bleak or the path impossible. Beware!! Negativity leads to depression-- don't let it happen to you!!
My thoughts must be His or I will find myself slipping down the slope of depression and that is simply not acceptable for a child of God!! It really isn't people!

Phil. 4:8-9 (Message) Summing it all up, friends, I'd say you'll do best by filling your minds and meditating on things true, noble, reputable, authentic, compelling, gracious—the best, not the worst; the beautiful, not the ugly; things to praise, not things to curse. Put into practice what you learned from me, what you heard and saw and realized. Do that, and God, who makes everything work together, will work you into his most excellent harmonies.

Where Am I?

What a horrible question to having going through you mind!! Whether it's being asked while stuck in Atlanta traffic, hiking in the woods, shopping in the mall, or just at home trying to figure out life; I hate this question!
I don't like to be lost in ANY kind of way.
I don't like to feel helpless or not know what's around the corner.
Not knowing where you are, no matter if that's geographical or not, is a scary place to be.
But I have been here before; this place is unfortunately familiar.
Oh yeah, this is that place where I 100% have to rely on the Lord, where He is the only one that knows where I am and where I am going.
This is the place that the blindfold is on, and He takes my hand and says--
'Do you trust Me Starr?'
He gently whispers,
'Here comes a step here; lift up your foot.'
or maybe He says
'Now we're going in some deep water, but I've got you.'
but then I know there will be that sure time were I hear Him say
'Okay, now the blindfold is coming off- are you ready for your surprise?'
I'M SOOOOO READY LORD!!!

I know it is going to be worth it!
He knows where I am all the time, and His banner over me is love. I am safe!

Question of the Week

Hello Fellow Bloggers. As a mom that wishes she had all the answers, but every day realizes that she doesn't-- I would propose a 'mommy question for the week'.

And here it is:
What do you do if there is a neighborhood kid that wants to play with your kid, but your kid does not want to play with him? Do you force him to play with that kid?

I am in the process of teaching Matthew about compassion and kindness, and at times he will play with this kid, but this kid is younger, and Matthew has other boys his age that he would like to play with majority of the time in the neighborhood.

Help!!

Come over to Plunderful Life

Come check out my interview with Kim over here

http://www.plunderfullife.com/2008/09/id-like-you-to-meet-starr.html

This sight is such a blessing to so many single moms!!!

BFF How-To Video Entry

Here it is! Starr's and Brandy's BFF How-To Video Contest. (Cue dramatic music here.)

Prelude

This is the Prelude to the BFF How-To Video Contest. Enjoy!