Going With the Flow

My mind has been so restless with questions and wanderings about the future lately. What's coming Lord? What's coming Lord? WHAT'S COMING LORD? (I'm telling you: God really doesn't need a hearing aid-- His hearing is perfect.) I'm so thankful that the Lord does not get annoyed and run away, but also know that God only answers what He knows we need answers to, and strictly on His time table. I have also come to believe that multiple choice questions may not be from the Lord. We give Him our lists of questions and say "Okay God, is it A or B?", and then when we hear nothing then ALL has failed. We are a silly people, but still amazingly loved by an awesome God!!

This morning I finally woke up!! Literally, and in a totally new deeper 'awake' way all at the same time. I'm spending all this time asking questions instead of just enjoying the journey. God is obviously not going to answer my many questions right now, and for some reason there are things that simply must wait. The only question that really matters right now is 'Will I trust Him?', and I believe that I have decided that I don't really have a choice, but if I did I would still choose trust. He has never failed me, never disappointed me, and definitely never abandoned me. He has done and will continue to do everything He says He is going to do, and I don't have to understand it! (EXHALE!!) I really really don't!!

This morning the Lord reminded me of a vision (picture in my head) He had given me years ago. I was floating down a river. At some points the river was calm and it was safe to stand and check out the surroundings, and at the same time look a little ahead to see what was down stream. At other times the waters became rapids taking me down scary turns and jostling me to what felt like my sure death; what is coming? am I going to hit a rock, or tumble down a waterfall with sharp rocks at the bottom? what if I end up down a wrong stream and lost from the place I belong? when will the rapids end and I find rest? At those times I am desperate to attempt to stand and try to see ahead, just a small attempt to protect myself from what may or may not be coming, but sure enough standing would only cause me to lose strength, and be beaten by the very waves that are taking me exactly where I am suppose to be.

When the waters get ruff and the turns get scary there is no other position to be except prostrate before the Lord; keeping our focus up to higher places, to a MORE sure face. His-- The Director of the RIVER!! The Waters Himself.

I don't know what's ahead but He calls Himself Good and the works He does are also named the same: Good!!

Help me Lord to keep my focus on You. To not self protect but believe that You are taking me exactly where You want me to be, and if it leads to any death it will be the death of the thing that no longer needs to haunt me-- fear.